Great Britain

Weird country this, isn't it? When you put it all together, the bits, the attachments, what's next to them and what's inside them. Was never going to be simple, was always going to be trouble. 

I had a strange and unnerving thought recently ... I don't usually share any positions with extreme racists, and, let's be clear, that's not what I'm doing now, but all these far-right people lately saying "you can't be English unless your parents were born here, English is a cultural identity" ... now, as an adult, I think that's nonsense, of course, but, it is also, here's the thing, the basis for my lifelong cultural self-identity.

I've never considered myself English. Never wanted to. Even though I'm obviously English. But neither of my parents were born here, neither of them considered themselves English, my name is McGaughey, my big red face is not English. I've always baulked at "English". Can't really pin specifically what I am and in a way don't care, but anything but straightforward "English". Don't really like "British" either ... Anglo-Scots-Irish ... Celtic ... London Irish ... Ealingish ... 

so, yeah, funny country.

I was in Wales last week. What a place that is. Somehow or other, through work and holidays, holidays on which we have a base and then do our best to see a fair bit of the surrounding area, I've seen a lot of Wales. I mean, there are lots of parts of Wales from which you can see a long way, that's rather the point.

But I could draw dots and lines of all the parts of Wales I've been to, and there would not be that many parts of the map which were entirely untouched. Wales is a small country, after all.

It's also beautiful. I reckon in Wales you're never more than 10 miles from somewhere of preposterous beauty. If I was Welsh, I am quite sure I couldn't fail to be extremely proud of Wales. Look at our small and ridiculously beautiful country.

Scotland is bigger, and although I've spent much more total time in Scotland than in Wales, I haven't covered the whole of it quite so much, but the same truth holds, I reckon. Beautiful. Of course Scots are proud of it. Its two great cities are beautiful cities, for starters. Great waters, great mountains, feats of engineering, great stone.

Ireland is complicated. You've probably heard that already. People do say Ireland is a complicated place. I haven't seen enough of Ireland, though I did go on a couple of big tours as a kid. But my guess is it's also a beautiful place. In my memory, my family anecdote and book-fed imagination, it's wildly beautiful.

Ireland is Ireland. Ireland is Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland. The Republic of Ireland is itself. Northern Ireland is itself. Northern Ireland & Wales & Scotland & England. The United Kingdom. Ireland & Wales & England & Wales (& Man etc ...) - The British Isles. Or the Home Nations. Europe, containing The British Isles. The European Union, once containing the UK and the Republic of Ireland, now just the Republic of Ireland. England, Wales and Scotland. Great Britain. Or just Britain. Wales, Scotland & Ireland, the Celtic nations. Wales, Scotland & Northern Ireland, the devolved nations. Ireland and Scotland, the Gaelic McNations. Often, for legal purposes, England & Wales. Just Scotland. Just Wales. And, finally, unless I've missed any other distinct units, just England.

England is maybe not so beautiful? Percentage-wise? Not so magnificent. More of it is just ok .... if we're being fair. There are some pretty great bits, but you can do plenty of journeys through England and be surrounded by reasonable okness for quite a long time. No disrespect. When it's good it is really good.

And, you know, London's London. Can't beat London. Ugly and beautiful and full of villages and massive. But a lot of England has decided to set itself against London. Mention London in Kent and there's a not inconsiderable chance you'll hear someone say something racist within a minute (yes, this is tested and true, sorry ...)

England's also, let's be fair, the oppressor. The bully. When people hate Britain, it's England they hate, mainly.

I somewhat hate England. I've always loathed patriotism and nationalism in general (and I never really buy into the attempts to completely separate the two, they're always pretty close) but I suspect I'd loathe it less if I hadn't grown up somewhat English/somewhat non-English in England. Jesus, these English. 

I took a picture recently in this town I live of a long road where every single lamppost has a tatty flag of St George on it and every single one of them was put up by a racist and no one has taken them down. England, this fucking England.

Though, still, I support the England football and cricket teams like my life depends on it, support the British Olympians, bridle and hiss when online Americans say the slightest negative thing about this fine country. During the World Cup when even more flags go up,  we'd be going through the town seeing all the flags and going "hmm, think that one's a non-racist one, that one's a racist one" etc...

Gosh, if the independence movements gather some real momentum, imagine that. I think, by now, I believe in a united Ireland, an independent Wales, and independent Scotland, but a) it's none of my business and b) I dread it.

So, yeah, glad, I've cleared up nothing. God save the flower of our fathers etc...